Taking responsibility - and an opportunity for you |
"In the long run we shape our lives and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt "If not now, when?" ~ Hillel "Every excuse I ever heard made perfect sense to the person who made it." ~ Dr Daniel T. Drubin What is it for you? Your boring job? A relationship that's not working? Your dream that you keep putting off? I'd guarantee that there's (at least) one area of your life that you're not happy with, that you feel stuck in or resistance about tackling. It's easy to lay the blame for your situation at someone else's door. Crap recruitment processes, saying the wrong thing, lack of opportunities. Sure, there's a grain of truth in all of those. But nothing will change unless you do. The key to open the door is taking responsibility for your situation - and then doing something different. I've had a couple of situations recently that have really wound me up. Cancellation of a meeting on the day for example. Of course, urgent things crop up from time to time for everyone. But when it happens repeatedly, it's a sure sign that the client is putting the urgent before the important. Having invested time and money in a coaching relationship to create the life she wants for herself, by cancelling the coaching conversation she is making a snap judgement about what is her priority - what's urgent. Is it really? Like the quote above says, the excuse she gives me makes perfect sense to her. Yet she is getting in her own way. You get what you focus on. Which is what keeps getting in the way of making her dream a reality. You see, it won't just happen with me, it will be happening with other people and in other areas of her life. Stepping back to consider what is the more sustainable choice, she might have made a different decision. But I also recognise my part in this. By allowing it to happen repeatedly I am saying that it's OK. Yes, I get paid for the cancelled session but that is not the point. The point is that I want to see her achieve the results she desires. Which means it's time to revisit our agreement and really flesh out what's getting in the way of her achieving what she wants in her life. Is there an area of your life where you are not taking responsibility? Where you are allowing other things to take priority over what you tell yourself you really want. Is that really your priority? And if so, what will it take to change your behaviour? Maybe this could help...? I'm in the process of putting together an online course. And I'm offering a small number of 15 minute complimentary Skype or phone coaching sessions. If there is a dream you'd like to realise or an area of your life where you currently feel stuck, I could help you create some space or movement. The choice of subject is yours, but the sessions will be recorded and could ultimately form part of the resources for the online programme, so that would be part of the deal. Interested? Contact me to be first to apply for one of the spots, and I will be in touch to arrange a time to suit us both. It could be the first step towards achieving that outcome you want.
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